Daddy Diary – The 2yr old criminal genius

My son lied for the first time yesterday.

He hasn’t reached three years old yet – and he consciously tried to bend the truth to fit his narrative.

OK, that might be going off the deep end, but you have to admit, that is pretty advanced for his age?

At this rate, by the age of 20, he’ll either be running the Large Hadron Collider or he’ll be plotting an elaborate ruse to steal the crown jewels with a gang of henchmen willing to do his bidding…

It was a Sunday morning when he committed perjury in the face of his parents. We were in the thick of the morning routine – two kids running away from mummy and daddy as we attempt to round up the cattle and get them clothed for the day. We had successfully navigated through the choppy waters of bathtime without being covered in excrement, urine or both and now we had set our sights on putting clothes on the little rascals. I often turn this part of the morning into a game, which often ends up in both kids screeching as I run after them.

It’s fun, but by the end, you’re pretty knackered. My wife lasso’s the youngest and she begins to brush his cute little gnashers and I ask my oldest if he has had his teeth brushed.

He says, “yes daddy, teeth brushed.”

Which we know is a lie as neither of us have done it yet.

He hates getting his teeth brushed and he had attempted to dodge this bullet.

I stopped running after him and said to my wife “Is that the first time he’s consciously lied to us?”

She couldn’t confirm but I think it is. And it is pretty early in terms of his age.

What next? Stealing money from mummies purse to fund his Haribo habit?

Cheating in games of Pop-up Pirate?

The mischievous grin of a criminal genius

In truth I’m not alarmed, I’m actually pretty impressed. At his tender age, to have the brainpower and awareness to do something like that is unexpected. We know the kid is pretty gifted – mind you, all parents think so – but what other kid before three can count to one hundred? Or can do the alphabet backwards?

Yep, he’s got the world at his feet and every time he spells a word or does something else to leave us flabbergasted, I take a second to give my wife and I a figurative pat on the back.

It’s easy to say he’s learned it all from YouTube, but we have taken the time to constantly talk to him, to play with him via different methods – craft, jigsaws, books, playing with cars that have numbers on, chalks in the garden, magnets on  the fridge – he just really enjoys it and if he continues showing this aptitude, then school will open up new possibilities for him.

Our job is then to keep him on the straight and narrow when temptation comes calling.

So when your child does something pretty amazing, don’t downplay it. Don’t think that this might just be normal.

Because your kid is anything but, and your hard work is helping create a little miracle.

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